Wednesday, January 12, 2011

The audacity to be bad mannered!

This period at Great Lakes has taught me a lot of things and continues to- both inside and outside the class rooms - but if I have to cull out a few of those things, it would be my learning from observing the behavior of people. This post is crudely judgmental and hence a deviation from one of my cardinal principles of life - "Never to judge other people's behavior". The fact is being bad mannered, impolite, insensitive, rude and obnoxious is so pervasive here that it makes me wonder whether good manners were meant only for the generation of our parents! 

Take these for example - 

  • Some people don't know the meaning of "please" and don't know how to request things. If they need to get their work done, (purely selfish reasons), they won't mind calling you at any time of the day and demand your bike keys as if you are under some obligation to give them the keys. The most audacious part is that they call you only if they want your bike keys; otherwise you are a "nobody" to them. The proportion of these kind of people is simply astounding and mind boggling. It defeats me how easily they can taken others for a ride...!
  • Some people behave in 10 different ways with 10 different people. Perhaps, they think, everyone is different and should not be treated with the same level of courtesy and politeness. But what about some basic good manners? To the same question, depending on who poses it, a person is either brash (impolitely expresses his rigid stance on the matter) or sweetly indifferent wriggling his way out of it altogether. Strange! Whatever happened to the manners we were taught when we were young! I suppose, they have gone out of fashion or have become too flexible to lose all meaning.
  • Some people consider it their birthright to demand of others, what they want. Even if they do it with their friends, shouldn't they just put themselves for a minute in the other person's shoes and think if the same behavior or demand (in this case) would have been acceptable if they had been the recipient party? Odds are less they would agree but then, do they bother to think that far?
  • Some people are just too proud of their charms and if they get to spend time with an equally charming person, they don't mind ignoring a less charming third person. The amount of importance they give to looks is sickening and disgusting.
  • Beyond a certain point in any relationship between two people, one gets so used to the other that he/she might be willing to overlook the other person's faults and accept them as they are. But, in the long run, is it good? Shouldn't we instead try to tell them that their behavior is a little arrogant and they should try to change it? Isn't that doing more to strengthen the relationship? Anybody who cannot accept negative feedback patiently from a friend who has done enough to show them that he cares or cannot even give an ear to him, is not worth spending time with!
  •  The word "cool" has lost its meaning if it had one in the first place. If you don't conform to your peers, you are simply not "cool" 
Well, I can write volumes on this, will save more for later. One thing to ponder about - basic good manners is on a rapid decline. 

6 comments:

Surabhi said...

Siva, just give back a no-nonsense attitude :). "Good manners" seem and also sound archaic, the word of this generation is probably : attitude.
In its various forms of "cool", "great", "outward", "peevish", "odd", "introvert", etc.. defined by the peer group in a particular setting/location/institution.

Hari said...

Shiv,

Dood, its kul. :P :D

Jokes apart...
Semma kaduppala irukka pola.. I experience something very similar everyday..

sometimes I soooo wish people have maturity according to their age.

Shiva said...

@ Surabhi: Will try to, thanks...

@ Hari: "Semma kaduppala irukka pola" exactly da...and some of these people can get really annoying...they are simply not worth our time...

Prathiba said...

I can sense your frustration in this entry... :)

But I cannot agree more and I can assure you it is not just whr you are, it is prevalent everywhr...

And forget good manners, you should see the complete disregard for food.. angers me no end...

Shiva said...

@ Prathiba: "But I cannot agree more and I can assure you it is not just whr you are, it is prevalent everywhr..." I think in some places, one's perception depends on several other factors, but in a secluded campus, with nothing else around, it is more stifling...general state though, is quite lamentable.

RAVISHANKAR said...

Hi Siva,

U are one of the more patient guy i ve seen but really sad to hear this from u. But this kinda of persons r still ter in the world and we need to teach them the lesson by being cool da.. Be cool man. All ll be fine. Talk to ur good friends whenever u feel like this that might give some good things to u da :) take care da...