On Chaos, order, reflections and free will

Like a pendulum gone crazy, my moods swing hither and thither,

Thoughts emerge only to recede among the crevices; gather 

and swell, only to flounder and wither. A hundred memories juggle

for attention, few engage, many tease and mock, in a stark irony!

Here I am, waiting for time to cease, to pause and stay still. 

I need to rewind, relive; take stock, walk without the taunt of 

the next moment and the dread of another dawn turning to dusk.

As the grains of time gather in weight, the measuring glass tilts.

It is all hazy, like a train running at high speed and the rattling

windows thundering to their own rhythm. Chaos prevails!

The stop when it comes, will it be abrupt? Will I remember the 

person sitting next to me or will the overwhelming noise cloud 

out the recollection? I fear and a chill runs down my spine. 

The child next aisle was cute, the girl opposite, sweet.

Were they mirages or did they exist for real? Was I imagining

things and telling stories to myself? Was it free will or destiny,

was it fate or fortune? 

The mills of time have their own rules, slow or fast, 

harsh or gentle, His will shall decide. 

The pawns are sacrificed while the knights wait their turn.